Helping survivors pick up the pieces
Law enforcement officers from the Kellogg Police Department and Shoshone County Sheriff's Office discuss their investigation outside of a residence where an attempted murder/suicide took place on the morning of Sept. 19.
Courtesy of the SCSO
WALLACE — Coming off multiple attempted strangulation and battery cases as well as an attempted murder/suicide in the Silver Valley in recent weeks, Shoshone County Crisis and Resource Center personnel want to ensure that when a crisis scenario strikes, people know who and where they can turn to.
Executive director Kellie Lavigne is always trying to find new ways to forge those critical community connections to throw a lifeline to those experiencing violence and abuse.
“It comes in waves, it really does. We’re very concerned, but we are here to assist and walk them through the system,” Lavigne said.
Often in cases of domestic abuse, if an incident was known only to those involved, confusion or shame can keep survivors from confiding in others they trust for support. Talking about what happened is vital to addressing victim safety and forging bonds that will help empower them, but Lavigne said that it’s hard for many to take that first step towards self advocacy.
“Once they speak it, it’s real. If they don’t tell anybody, it’s not real,” she said.
In the aftermath of a case of domestic abuse, the ripples extend beyond the initial circle of abusers and victims. Staff at the advocacy organization break it down into primary and secondary victims. Those who are trying to help survivors recover in the wake of the aftermath often feel helpless when it comes to overcoming the trauma and violence of the inciting incident.
Since the 1990s rights for crime victims have been part of the Idaho Constitution, but many domestic abuse or violence victims can find the process of reporting their experiences to dredge them up all over again.
“It’s a very public trauma,” Lavigne said. “Someone coming into a relationship that has never experienced domestic violence before, their first instinct is, well, that really didn’t happen. It did, but they want to fix it. They can fix it. He’s sorry, she’s sorry. It goes both ways. Women are abusive, too. It’s a learned behavior.”
Toxic and violent behaviors have a tendency to escalate over time. If you know of someone facing control issues within a relationship who you’re concerned about, the best thing to do is keep the lines of communication open and make them aware of places like the Crisis and Resource Center where you can talk things through confidentially.
“One thing I say to a lot of my clients is that you don’t fall out of love overnight. If it’s not healthy, it’s OK to still love the person, but it’s not a healthy situation. So many clients over the years have been telling me that they think they’re going crazy and I go, 'No, no, no, you’re not going crazy,'” Lavigne said.
To help with meeting victim needs, the advocacy organization has just added a new mental health professional, Linda Sepa-Newell, to the team to assist with advocacy and crisis care for survivors. The Shoshone County Crisis and Resource Center has two locations, one in Pinehurst and one in Wallace to break down some of the distance barriers to receiving aid.
“Everything’s confidential unless you’re a child because we’re mandatory reporters or unless you’re elderly. Once you start working with a client, they are driving the boat. We aren’t forcing them to do anything,” Lavigne said.
By the numbers
Individuals using the Shoshone County Crisis Resource Center by year
2022: 205
2021: 244
2020: 167
For 24-hour help, call the Shoshone County Crisis and Resource Center at 208-556-0500.
In Kootenai County, contact Safe Passage by calling 208-664-9303; texting 208-449-7228 or emailing safety@safepassageid.org.